Calling all single males Yes you are
Well the bad news first off single males are 10 a penny, as
you will find on all swinger’s web sites and contact magazines, that’s a fact
of life. The good news! Yes you are wanted and you can meet some wonderful
people, make great friends, and have a good time as well as the brilliant sex
with no strings attached. You are here to have fun; the same as the couple or
single fem are looking for. You are not a replacement no matter how good you
think you are, you are there to help fulfil their fantasies and yours. If you
are looking for a relationship then I suggest you try a date line.
So what makes the difference between single males? Why are
some more successful then others? Why do some get meet after meet whilst you
are still left on the subs bench with your tracksuit on? Strange but believe it
or not it has nothing to with being as a sex god, a huge penis or the ability
to breathe through your ears (although this can have a distinct advantage). It
is all about your attitude and approach to swinging. If you think you have
joined the site and will be instantly into sexual heaven, well bad news for you
it will take time and the right attitude.
But all is not lost and it may seem a daunting task because
people can tend to forget that it is just as nerve racking for you as it is for
them. So where do you start?
Your profile, most people will look at your profile after
you have mailed them or after a time of chatting in the room. As they say first
impressions count and it will be there first chance to look at you. The basic
profile outlines what you are looking for and what your interests are. They
want to know a bit about the real you and not your cock size, your sexual
prowess or how many people you have bedded.
Take your time, this does not mean rewriting War and Peace,
just a few lines that are TRUTHFUL and explain a bit about yourself. Try to
make this as light hearted as possible, after all this should be fun. Humour
and an easy going attitude goes a very long way.
As for your pictures surprise surprise most people and
certainly those who are swinging have seen a few cocks in their time and unless
it sings tunes, dances or glows in the dark, there is no need to ‘swamp’ your
profile with your impressive manhood. Again people want to see the real you, a
nice body shot either clothed or unclothed will do and a definite advantage is
a facial picture.
Remember swingers come in all shapes and sizes and you
should not be afraid to put pictures on. They will only be seen by full members
as basic or visitors cannot see your photos. If you are too shy to put on
facial pictures you can always say that you can mail them a facial picture and
mention this in your profile. If you are not prepared to show facial pictures
or any pictures that is up to you. The bottom line is people with facial
pictures on get a far better response than those with none on.
So you have designed your profile and now are raring to go
and join in this fantastic lifestyle what now? Well there are various ways of
getting in contact with people, either through the chat room, by mail, by
answering swing dates or requesting to attend parties.
Whichever way you chose it will take time, have patience. It
is a bit like chatting someone up in a bar, you would no go up to them and just
ask them for a shag (well you might at the risk of wearing your testicals as
earrings) people want to get to know you, make sure you are a nice guy that
they can have fun with and very important, feel comfortable with. Always remember
one thing, whilst you are nervous it can be very daunting for a couple or
single female to invite a complete stranger into their house or hotel room to
come and have sex with them. Always put yourself in their shoes, always be
respectful and under no circumstances ever ever be pushy, as soon as you are
you may as well leave, because everyone dislikes a pushy single male with a
If you want to meet couples, yes surprise surprise they do
come as a couple and the male half does attend; ignore him and you may as well
not bother, because you will never meet her, they are in a stable relationship
and doing this for fun, even though she will be more than likely making the
final decision do not ignore him. No matter what you think she is not going to
run off with you just to bonk you, that’s why they are swinging. Besides that
you miss the opportunity to make a good friend as well, because this is more
than just sex to most people.
So you finally have got a meet arranged. What next? How does
it go? What do I do? Well above all else be yourself be truthful and again do
not be pushy. You are there to have some fun so keep it light-hearted, but
ensure you cover the ground rules, before you start to play. This does not mean
that you produce a list of does and don’ts just check the rules. In swinging NO
means NO and stick to this. Apart from that you are in for a fun night enjoy it
and make sure that they also enjoy it.
Always remember that even though a meet has been arranged
this does not automatically mean you will end up having sex. It may well be
that there is no ‘chemistry’ between you all. There may be issues that the
couple have not spoken about that all of a sudden ‘come to light’ when they
finally realise what they are about to do. It happens on a few rare occasions
and can be very frustrating for you. After all it has taken you a long time to
get to this stage, a lot of talking, messaging etc etc and then it all goes
wrong. Again put yourself in theirs shoes, they may well be married, in a long
term relationship and are doing this to add some more fun to their life’s. This
is their marriage their relationship which they have to live with for a very
long time. This is one night for you and after all it is just sex just be a man
say thank you do not get involved and walk away, there will be other
Who ever said it would be easy, because it is not easy for
anyone. These are just a few pointers on how hopefully to be a bit more
successful but there is no manual, you have to feel your way (excuse the pun)
and do what you feel is right. It is very much like a community and if you are
new to it, like moving to a new town it takes time to be accepted. Once you are
seen to be nice guy and have had a few meetings then the lifestyle will open up
to you and you will have a fantastic time.
NEVER NEVER be pushy
Have a fun time because it is a fantastic lifestyle and you
will meet people from all walks of life and have some great fun.
From a tart of a single male.